I once shit myself in public
It’s true. I was nearing the end of a successful night of drinking when the bar closed and there was the promise of another late night venue to continue the festivities. I went to relieve myself in an alley. As I was in a hurry, I tried to force the issue and … well … I REALLY did not expect THAT to happen.
While I stood there, pissing, warm shit in my pants, scenarios buzzed through my head. Since it was winter and I was wearing layers – underwear, long underwear, pants, - I decided that I would let this play out. I had places to go and hopefully people to meet.
So like a trooper, I went with it. Through a cab ride, a walk around the city searching for a place I increasingly realized did not exist, and a long cab ride back to the apartment. I did not do anything sooner about the situation because I did not want to let on what had happened. Preferring to sit and walk around in my own filth than to reveal this secret.